“I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” – MJ.  Alternatively, Lavar Ball has never lost a game of basketball in his life. Ipso facto, Lavar Ball would beat Michael Jordan in a game of 1 on 1. Case settled.

Welcome to Who’s On First, where everything is made up and the points don’t matter (shout out Cleveland Super Fan Drew Carey). The objective of this blog is to recap last week’s sporting events, set the stage for what is coming up and tell you what to think about all of it. All the while, possibly solving, once and for all, the greatest debates in sports history. I hear too many opinions from sport simpletons that I feel it is my duty to educate and entertain.

Why do I even bother? Well, the people that are paid to talk about sports every day are absolutely nauseating. Skip and Shannon spewing their verbal diarrhea when I wake up in the morning is inhumane.  They are immediately followed by the biggest nerd in sports (I thought the 8th amendment protected against this?). Colin Cowherd, who “sold his stock” in the rams earlier this season, can’t resist comparing everything in sports to a 50-year-old, white dude going through a mid-life crisis. Not everything has to be a metaphor, Cowturd. The rest of FS1 is just a joke. All day I see fedoras, fat guys, and token female hosts/mediators. Speaking of token female hosts (not that there’s anything wrong with that), First Take kicks off the day for ESPN in the morning. The dialogue between Screamin’ A Smith  and the white guy isn’t quite verbal diarrhea, I think two coyotes stuck in a trash compacter fighting over scraps is more fitting. Oh wait, I forgot about Get Up. Greenberg makes me chuckle, but any show that portrays Rex Ryan as an expert is un chiste (did I mention this was a bilingual blog?). That’s right, I’m talking about you too NFL Countdown. ESPN used to be the king. ESPN was awesome when it was just Sports Center. Nobody was shoving their god-awful sports takes down my throat and forcing me to swallow. Eventually the internet came along and highlights were so easily accessible, it made Sports Center obsolete. We didn’t need to wait until the morning show or the “The Six”. We had everything on our phones 24/7. That’s when ESPN decided to become MSNBCESPN. They turned into a liberal debate channel. They no longer reported about sports but argued about it instead. And we all know how wrong these idiots are. They argue stats, give their opinions and none of it is worth a damn. The whole point of these shows is to get the buzz going with their hot takes. They want to give the most outlandish opinions so that you’ll watch and talk about it the rest of the day. They don’t care about being right, they just want to be relevant. And that is why this need to be written.

So back to the question, why do I even bother? …Simple, I need to make extra money to pay my bookie.

In the gambling world, true odds, as opposed to fixed odds, refer to the actual probability of winning. If we were to bet on a coin flip, the true odds are 50-50, or 1-1. Your bookie wouldn’t offer that bet at even odds because he needs to see a profit, he’d give you the bet at fixed odds. This is called the vig or juice. It’s most commonly seen as +110 (You have to bet $110 to win $100 on a 50-50 bet). True odds represent reality, that’s what this blog is all about.

NFL: It’s super bowl week and the Patriots are a 2.5 point favorite with 80% of the bets being placed on the Patriots. That probably doesn’t mean much to you but if you were to bet on this game, would you rather bet on the team the general public is betting on, or who Vegas is betting on? There’s a reason huge luxurious hotels keep going up in the desert. Tom Brady is 41 years old, but does that really matter? No, because historically he is the greatest quarterback ever and still obviously capable of winning this super bowl.  Sean McVay is 33 years old, but does that really matter? Clearly not. He’s considered to be the best young coach in the NFL and very capable of winning this super bowl. Too bad the Redskins thought he was too young to be a head coach. Football is a game that can go either way depending on how the ball bounces. The Rams have a better team but the Patriots have experience. I think the Rams are pro enough to handle the big stage (nothing can be more difficult than beating the saints in the super dome) and I think McVay is good enough to put together a game plan that can at least match Belichick’s. Since 80% of people are betting on the patriots, I’m sure this will be an unpopular opinion, I’m betting on the Rams this Sunday. Taking the points and might partake in a little money line action 😉. This isn’t to say the Patriots aren’t going to win the game, like I said before, football is not the type of game where the better team always wins. Close games almost always come down to how the ball bounces (double doink), how the referees call the game, and how deflated the footballs are.   

NBA: Lebron is still hurt, though he should be back soon. Golden State is sleep walking through the season. It will be interesting to see who they beat in the finals. Let’s get to summer free agency already and see who will be playing with Lebron next year. Anthony Davis (maybe even this year)? Kyrie? Lamelo?? Kobe??? As a Lakers fan those 40/1 odds are tempting… Houston at 15/1 and Celtics at 8/1 are a steal.

ODDS TO WIN THE 2018-19 NBA FINALS (6/15/19)

Team	Odds
Golden State Warriors	1/2
Boston Celtics	8/1
Toronto Raptors	8/1
Houston Rockets	15/1
Milwaukee Bucks	20/1
Oklahoma City Thunder	30/1
Philadelphia 76ers	30/1
Los Angeles Lakers	40/1
Denver Nuggets	55/1
Utah Jazz	60/1
Indiana Pacers	75/1
San Antonio Spurs	75/1
New Orleans Pelicans	200/1
Los Angeles Clippers	250/1
Portland Blazers	250/1
Charlotte Hornets	350/1
Miami Heat	400/1
Detroit Pistons	500/1
Minnesota Timberwolves	500/1
Dallas Mavericks	600/1
Memphis Grizzlies	600/1
Orlando Magic	600/1
Brooklyn Nets	750/1
Washington Wizards	1000/1
Sacramento Kings	1250/1
Atlanta Hawks	9999/1
Chicago Bulls	9999/1
Cleveland Cavaliers	9999/1
New York Knicks	9999/1
Phoenix Suns	9999/1

MLB: There’s been trivial signings throughout the off-season. The big names Harper and Machado are still unsigned. It’s a growing trend to see big names sit out free agent market for most of the off-season and sometimes even into spring training. They think they’re worth 200 and 500 million dollars. They’re not wrong because there is no salary cap and the owners are making more money than ever. But that doesn’t obligate them to spend 9-figures on these guys. On the other side, the owners are using the luxury tax as an excuse not to sign these big contracts. The tax comes into effect if teams spend over $206,000,000 during the 2019 season. But honestly they don’t care about paying this tax if they have a chance to win a World Series, like I said, they are making more money than ever right now. The Yankees were under the threshold in 2018, but they had been over the threshold in the previous 14 consecutive seasons and had to pay an extra $319.6 million over that time period. So basically, the Owners have the money that these big-name players are asking for, but if no other teams are going to pay that much money, why should they? That’s why baseball is America’s sport, capitalism at its finest. They can have Bryce Harper at a .250 avg with 34 HRs for $500 mill over 12 years, or they can bring up an outfielder through their system who hits .270 with 18 HRs for $500,000/year.  I’ll take the young minor leaguer with potential and a new 120’ yacht instead of Harper or Machado. The frightening thought is that if things keep going the way they are, a baseball players strike could be very possible in 2019. Let’s hope it doesn’t come to that.

Betting baseball futures are difficult because of all the trades during the year. I’m waiting to make my pick until the dust has settled.

ODDS TO WIN 2019 WORLD SERIES (11/1/19)

Team	Odds
Boston Red Sox	6/1
Houston Astros	7/1
Los Angeles Dodgers	7/1
New York Yankees	7/1
Chicago Cubs	12/1
Cleveland Indians	12/1
St. Louis Cardinals	12/1
Atlanta Braves	14/1
Washington Nationals	16/1
Philadelphia Phillies	18/1
Milwaukee Brewers	20/1
New York Mets	25/1
Oakland Athletics	30/1
Tampa Bay Rays	30/1
Colorado Rockies	35/1
Chicago White Sox	50/1
Los Angeles Angels	50/1
Cincinnati Reds	100/1
Minnesota Twins	100/1
Pittsburgh Pirates	100/1
San Francisco Giants	100/1
San Diego Padres	120/1
Texas Rangers	200/1
Toronto Blue Jays	200/1
Arizona Diamondbacks	500/1
Baltimore Orioles	500/1
Detroit Tigers	500/1
Kansas City Royals	500/1
Miami Marlins	500/1
Seattle Mariners	500/1

NHL: Hockey talk to come once playoff beards start showing up in April.

The Best of the Week: Australian Open: Wheelchair Tennis. Check out his acceptance speech as well: Speech.

Thanks for reading or whatever. Too bad you will never get these 10 minutes back.

Helpful tip of the week:  Don’t waste your money and time by buying a washer/dryer. Just donate your clothes to goodwill each week, they’ll wash and put everything on hangers, and then buy them back the next day for $1 apiece.

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Kevin Leonard